It’s not up to me!
A weary elevator operator at a
department store had patiently answered shoppers’ questions all
day. Just before closing, a voice from the rear of the crowded
car piped up, “Suppose the elevator cables broke, would we go up
The operator’s patience finally gave way.
“That,” he answered, “depends entirely on the kind of life
you’ve been living.”
(Don't) Show Me the Money
watching Mother Teresa care for a dying charge once remarked, "I
wouldn't do that for a million dollars." Mother Teresa replied,
"Neither would I."
Consensus .. or Nonsensus?
Definition of a committee: A group of
people who individually can do nothing, but as a group decides
that nothing can be done.
Every year I review the Christmas
story with my young students. “You know Jesus was born in a
stable,” I said. “What would you like to say to Jesus, Mary, and
Joseph?” I looked around the room, expecting a pious response.
“Hang in there!” one boy excitedly cried out. “Things can only
Would That You Could
Definition of a crisis: A situation
in which you can’t say, “Let’s forget the whole thing.”